monday night crack in todd's room

hi. my name is jennifer kucirek, and i watch laguna beach.

i think that we need to start a LBA (laguna beach anonymous) group so that we can all find a safe place to talk about our addiction to the show and help each other get over it. maybe these blogs are a way to do that. i'm feeling brave right now, so i will share my story with the rest of you:

as i was starting my junior year of college at uno, my friends and i heard about this new reality show. just like people who casually try smoking weed and get addicted, we casually started watching laguna beach. in all honesty, we knew it was wrong; we knew we shouldn't have been doing it. but it just felt so right...so safe and comfortable.

so the weekly hits of laguna beach grew from that casual use, where we just kind of stumbled across it, to planned weekly gatherings to watch the show. after class, we all drove to zack's dorm--i guess the thought of getting caught was kind of exciting back then. then the rest of the night was a blur. i don't even know where time flew once we turned to mtv.

i've lost so much of my life to this addiction.

after the first season ended, i thought that i would have enough time to get over the fucking "real orange county" kids. a few months would pass before the new season was set to begin, and besides, it was going to focus on kristen who i couldn't stand in the first season. but it was that damn hour-long "catching up with laguna beach" episode that caught me. i thought that i could just watch it to see how college was treating stephen, lo, lc, trey, deiter, and the rest of the gang.

but it was a trick. and as soon as i turned it on, i was hooked once again. now i've settled into a life of one hour monday night football/one hour laguna beach. i hit my all-time low about a month ago. i got to work early because my lab was short that day, and as i flipped through the channels i heard the oh-so-familiar sounds of hilary duff music and the roaring surf underneath high-pitched snotty voices that can only come from 17 and 18 year old girls. i tried to change the channel, but it was no use. the next half hour was spent with one eye on the monitor and one on the hallway to make sure no one came in.

it's pathetic, i know. but i also know that there are people out there with stories just like mine...some are even worse. those of us that are addicts, we aren't proud of our ways. but now that we can admit to ourselves and to the people around us that we do, in fact, have a problem, we can begin the healing process. so i invite anyone out there who is a laguna beach addict to come forward when the time is right. tell your story and maybe you will be the one to help someone else come to grips with their addiction. good luck to all of you.



"no i won't cry on the outside, anymore."