why me?

do you ever wonder if it's worth it? is all the time spent trying to better yourself really going to mean anything to "the man"? are the sleepless nights spent contemplating miniscule changes in your work worth a possible job 5-10 years from now? does it make sense to stress yourself out to the point of exhaustion and disease just so that you can hopefully make the tiniest of impression on someone who might have a slight acquaintance with another person who would consider giving you an interview if the situation arises?

i find myself wondering that sometimes. i can't free myself from 100% of the concerns, but it's days like today that remind me that it's the times when you pay no attention to the impression you make on people that will actually leave the best impressions of them all.

be yourself at all times. easy to say...can be darn hard to do. not to say that i am a fake person who is constantly concerned with what people think of me. but i am the kind of person who's aware of my surroundings--especially when i'm in the presence of someone who(m) i respect professionally. long story short...although you can't control all concerns regarding how you come off to people in your industry, just be yourself and it will quite possibly be the best side of you.

randomness, i know. but i'm so taken aback by the circumstances that i've just been made aware of...whether it means as much as i think it means or not.


"no i won't cry on the outside, anymore."